follows you home
COMING SOON from Sadie Grubor…….
“Damon, we are not a cure for your pain and loss.” I stare at the ceiling after the words leave my lips.
“I know that Olivia.” He barks, but then his tone softens. “You make me feel better. I can’t deny that, but there is so much more to all of this. More than I realized would be involved when I came looking for you.”
“Why would you look for us? You had to know it would cause problems. What if I’d been married or had more children? Or what if I’d lost—?”
“There are a lot of what ifs, but I needed it. I know it’s hard for you to understand, because you don’t know what it’s like to lose everything and to feel so empty. It’s like a piece of you is carved out and nothing can fill it. It’s just a bottomless pit.”
Locking my jaw tight, I will myself not to cry, not to think about Isaac or his baby. If only Damon knew just how I could relate, he would be surprised. A part of me wanted to sympathize with him, but the selfish part didn’t want to share our common bond in sorrow and loss.
“Then this letter appears and there is confirmation that I may have a child out there in the world. There is a part of me living and breathing, but I don’t know what they look like, what their name is, if they are well. How could I not try to find you?”
He takes a deep breath before continuing.
“You think I’m using you both as a replacement. I understand why you think that, but it’s not true. Not anymore.”
Damon pauses and I open my mouth to speak, but he continues.
“At first, I was being selfish. I wanted to feel like a whole person again. I wanted to get back what I lost and fix all the mistakes I made. So, when I started looking for you, Alex, for anyone who conceived my child, it was in hopes to make me human once more – to feel alive.”
He shifts and rolls onto his side, bends his arm at the elbow and props his head on his fist.
“I died with them in that car, but felt resurrected the moment I saw him.” Damon’s eyes blaze with intensity. The fingers of his left hand start a slow trace over my cheek and jaw. “And then, there was you. You were unexpected.”
Until next time……